(not too) personal,  Uncategorized

Everything Happens For A Reason

Image credited to: http://www.thenation.com/sites/default/files/sick_woman_ss.jpg
Image credited to: http://www.thenation.com/sites/default/files/sick_woman_ss.jpg

Cliche.

I know but please bear  with me.

I have been sick the last couple of weeks. It started casual (?) and thus i ignored all the symptoms, do daily activity normally, but then it hit me hard few days back. Last night my temperature was a bold 39.1 Celsius. It was even higher the night before that made me practically a non-functioning piece of meat. Well, i won’t bore you about the detail of my sickness: chronic ulcer and recurring colitis. Also, the medical tests say that I just lack of HDL (at disconcerting ~20) and the level of my blood sugar is too low (~70). Guess i gotta do something about my life style.

Anyway. What i wanna say is that: It happens for a reason.

From this exhaustive series of medical tests and what they reveal, two of my friends are inspired to take the same one because they have felt something’s not right but are reluctant to take the test because… I don’t know. So they’ll take the test because having any kind of illness lurking in the dark to catch you unguarded at the most unsuspecting time is the least thing you wanna deal with in life, i guess.

This also reminds me of a situation a while back when i was still single (not that it’s relevant). I was so stressed out because i felt this constant pain on my chess and was afraid it could be some breast tumor or cancer. After doctor consults and lab test, turned out it was just a hormonal stuff. However, my friend who initially shied away to take the test in fear of a possible imminent danger until my case was resolved mustered up the courage and voila: 2 tumor nodes on her breast. She was then properly treated and has lived a healthy life ever since.

And then about fertility.

You know it is not an easy thing to talk about this ‘inadequacy’ in your life. Well, not at first. The first few years people would ask you “when are you gonna have a baby?”. Some of your friends or families or colleagues flaunted theirs and the others would start asking “when is your turn?”. The bold ones would constantly nag you with their ‘prayers’ and advice on this and that dietary tips for fertility. However, along the years you are living with it, you become numb OR an expert at comeback. and then at the acceptance stage you realize that all those are just normative, people don’t really mean harm just because you are not the same, and some were just trying to be friendly in ways they see fit and thus no need to be all heavy-booted about it. Right now, i think i manage to tell when someone is coming to me with related question about (in)fertility just because or when they are actually anxious about their own condition. For the latter, i would sit down with them and gladly talk all about it. Not because i am a doctor, an expert or a fertility guru but simply because i have been longer wearing these shoes (7 going on 8 years now). Chances are, i have been where they are and at least i could sit and just listen to them without any prejudice. So far, there was a two-years-married couple following my ‘input’, going to the right androlog and SPOG(K) later and get diagnosed. Their baby is now a happy chubby toddler. The other one mustered up their courage and found a varicocele and had undergone appropriate medical procedure.

See.

I am not saying i am the cause of all that. I am saying that we are destined to take some role in life, a ring in the chains of every situation. When you are sick, see the bright side: your body need you to rest, to take better care of itself, to reset or for other people inspired to take any measure so not to be sick like you (seriously guys, it wouldn’t hurt to take routine medical checkup as a precautionary action).

Everything happens for a reason. I am now sure that i’m not given a role as a parent for a reason and that might be the best one I don’t know about.

Even if I die (either sooner or later) i’d try my best that it is for another good reason, something like: easing other people’s burden or pain.

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